Wherever it takes us
It has been a while my loves… It felt good to take some time off, to think, to live, to disconnect. I wanted to step away from the blog for a while just because that’s simply how I felt. And just because, that’s simply what I needed. I’ve always functioned on instincts and for what I know there is not a precise explanation to why I haven’t been posting much lately. The best explanation I could actually give you is that I have been grasping every single second of life to the fullest and this requires a total presence… offline. Life carries millions of inspiring opportunities, and it’s so important to be present in the moment, curious, with our eyes wide open, to see and to feel. From what I remember of myself before Kayture took me on a rollercoaster, I used to read 2 books a week, go to museums, walk around endlessly, get lost, lay around in my bed for hours and just day dream, take the time…And these were the moments where I got my best ideas. This is actually how I got the idea to start a blog.
For the last couple of years, I haven’t been taking the time. Time was taking me. I was carried away by the amount of things to do, and things to think about. So much, that I forgot what it felt like to be bored, or what it felt like to lazy around and do nothing, for real. There’s nothing necessarily wrong about that, especially when you’re in your early twenties living your passion. I would even say it’s pretty incredible to be able to do that. So I would always think to myself “life is short, you have to live to the fullest, embrace every occasion to the fullest” but I was living so much, seing so much, meeting so many new people, that the pace of it simply didn’t allow me to appreciate everything I was experiencing to the fullest as well. Keeping things balanced becomes tricky at times and there were moments where I felt like I was loosing track of it all, and forgetting what’s truly important on the way. When extraordinary becomes routine, it’s time to step back and put things in perspective. All I needed, all I craved was some time to reconnect with the simplicity of things, slow it down to understand better the beauty of each moment and focus on quality instead of quantity.
I’ve always said it, there’s nothing I love more that sitting for hours with my friends, or even strangers, and have intense, challenging, deep conversations about everything and nothing. We all have a lesson to teach and we all have a lesson to learn. And although you might have seen on my social media that I have been very active lately with trips, new projects, new achievements, I can tell you that inside, something shifted. I cared more for simpler things, slower moments, I craved depth and was in a constant reflective mood questioning a lot of things around me. I challenged myself to think differently, to think outside of the box and especially outside of myself. And this helped me understand, how much I missed writing.
I’ve been spending a lot of time working on my music. Developing this project has been, can’t hide, won’t hide it, a massive pressure. It gave me so much anxiety that there were nights where I could barely sleep. I thought “What if they hate it?”, “What if I’m not meant for it?”. Insomnia and vivid dreams became a routine as I would constantly hear these voices in my head putting a question mark over everything. I would dream of me running after something that kept disappearing, playing hide and seek in a wicked, haunted maze… Passion however couldn’t exist without fear and doubts. I wouldn’t care crafting something I believe in so much if it didn’t challenge or scare me to this point. The experience wouldn’t be as grasping.
So in the middle of this, Paris fashion week came, and it took us on an Air France plane ride across the world from L.A to the Charles de Gaule airport where we have our second, frenchie life, our french friends and our beloved habits. I’ve been loving this balance between California and Paris. We are lucky enough to get the best of both worlds. The long walks, the red wine and endless talks in Paris, the sunshine, long drives, the shadows of the palm trees in our living room in L.A… Both cities are so inspiring and if there’s one thing that’s been difficult is saying goodbye to our friends each time. No matter where we are, we miss the ones that we left on the other continent. But life goes on and as we meet again 2 weeks later, we all have so many stories to tell each other. The shows these season have been so beautiful and inspiring. I dressed depending of my mood, without even trying honestly. Fiona’s best friend Anthony Tâche came along and played the role of our photographer for the time of this PFW season, which was a total blast. I could keep going for hours and tell you more about everything, but here’s for now, a little recap of these last couple of days in Paris! When I was still a blondie ;) I promise to write more these next couple of days. Love you guys. Enjoy x